Thursday, June 26, 2003

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAY Exams are over!!!!!!! Well I still have another year of high school to go but, I'm happy that I don't have English to contend with anymore!!! Now here are my plans for summer:

#1 Clean my room (1 day)
#2 Fix the old and new computers of the house as well as network them(1 week or more)
#3 Finish that last Math textbook in my room!!! (1 month)
#4 Study courses for next semester (All summer with my IRL friends)
#5 Build a model plane by the end or the summer (1 month)
#7 Build my robot (Igor Sikorsky style: Didn't know how to initiallly build/design/fly a helicopter, but made a successful one anyways)!
#8 Organise for competitions next year.

That's about all I can think of at the moment. Now anything I'll be thinking about this summer, besides my super packed schedule? Well it's not really super packed, if i do each item for an hour. What am I thinking? Oh just the normal stuff, I don't have enemies currently, so I'm not plotting anything like I usually do. I'm thinking about what I will accomplish with my robots, the competitions, and what will become of me with these achievements. Personally, I have no idea because it depends greatly on whether I have the support of others, or not.

If I have the support of my family, and the rest of society. My creations will reflect the positive society, as my creations may be used for construction, exploration, and other useful applications. If I am thought of as crazy by my family, and rejected by everyone for being weird. My creations will reflect my anger at society. Everyone thinks that a RL Gundam, Battlemech Atlas, and Imperial Chicken Walkers are fiction. They are fiction for the size that they are depicted, but if they are built to the same size as a Human, or smaller, they can be dangerous automated assault troops that are disposable. The faction that uses these will have no military losses except for maybe the loss of mech units. Their loss of life for military personnel would almost be 0. However, on the side seeing these units as enemy, will find themselves swamped by thousands, millions of enemies. There won't be any long struggles over land, or stalemates. It'll either be complete victory, or total annihlation.

As you can see, I have much more analysis on strategy to destroy life, instead of maintain it. Perhaps I think like this because I've never actually found that special girl that will perservere through the possibility of battering down the evil nature within me.

Sunday, June 15, 2003

Okay, today is mainly a reflection on my night at what is TO BE (Not IS, because I'm still in HS for another year) my university residence. It was a clear night, with a full moon. I looked out at the window and first thought "I think I'll take pictures of this beautiful city at night" So I did take a couple of pictures (6 pictures). Afterwards, when everyone had gone to sleep, and I was left alone, I opened the window, and the blinds (all lights off) to see the scenery unobscured and with the moon shining in. I realized that I want to live, work, and spend the rest of my life right there. I will live comfortably there, and most likely will be the place I live the rest of my life alone. I went to sleep, and woke up with 2 weird dreams (please go to the link of where my dreams blog entry on June 15, 2003). Afterwards, I went to the exercise room, did some exercise, and then I talked with family about what would happen in the late future. My parents will either pass on, or live in nursing homes. Bro would probably live in the apartment that we spent last night sleeping in, I will inherit the parents house and have my blue beetle buzzing around to bro, sis, and parents. Sis would probably have a castle/manor/estate/BIG HOUSE with pool tennis court, a red car and not let me in to crash for a night. Anyways, that's all, the main thing today is the 2nd dream I had (recurring imagery of the colours red and violet)

Friday, June 13, 2003

Time to update this place before it becomes a dusty empty book in the basement. First, I've downloaded 1 CD by the group "Every Little Thing" and I can't stop listening to them (Current favourite is Feel My Heart)!!! Also I got a MP3 CD player, That's 20hrs of Music per disc!!!! Woohoo, unfortunately the player saps energy like crazy (5hrs of playing time before my Nickel Metal Hydrides die). I have 2 of my 4 mp3 CDs done too. I've been pretty busy because it was term paper and presentation time, and now it I'm approaching exam week. A quick rerun of my month is the Robot competition (Yay, my team won!!!), my English term paper and presentation (yay, upped my mark 5%), Stats tests/quizzes, paper and presentation (Don't know my mark, so I'm still nervous about that), and bio tests.

Anyways, that's all fairly normal stuff. Now for bad stuff. On Sunday, I lost my internet connection due to network problems. It seems my network card does not function anymore. So I spent 2 days fixing it, and I restore my network connection by redirecting my internet connection to my USB-network hub, and connecting to the internet via USB. Now I have Hard Drive problems as the computer bios does not even detect my 2nd hard drive (which has the other 2 mp3 CDs on it still). So now I have to fix that too. That's the material problems.

Now here's a "correlation" (gets whacked by friends for bringing statistics class back) between Charles Brown, and I:
Charles Brown
-Liked a red-haired girl
-was always afraid to approach her
-always finishes last
-always searches for deeper meanings in life
-nobody listens to him
-ridiculed by his society for his mistakes.

-Liked a red-haired girl
-was always afraid to approach her
-always finds something out too late (might as well finish last then)
-always searches for deeper meanings in life
-nobody listens to him
-ridiculed by his society for his mistakes

Now another issue that bothers me every day, every night, every spare period, and even when I am changing to my next class. I still look for a girlfriend, but not as a possession. I look for her because I wish to know that there is somebody out there who will listen to me (as in just me expressin, not commanding) and who can support me, as I will try my best to return what she is looking for in me. My family will only support me if they think it is worthwhile to do so. My friends are supportive, but they are my friends, you don't spill your guts out to your friends. In other words, I am looking to be close to someone. A few problems though is that courtship here in society is much harder than let's say where Kero lives (*gets whacked by Kero's hammer card*). Here a guy and a girl have to drop hints to each other (one of them being sit closer). However, it is hard to tell whether these hints are meant for their purpose, or they are done merely to adapt to the change in circumstances in the environment (sit closer intentionally, or to give room to another on the other side). Secondly, when asking a girl out on a date, she has to be alone to minimize rumour spread capability. This is VERY HARD to do since girls are rarely alone ANYWHERE these days, with scares of sex offenders, murderers, and so forth. IF one gets this far AND the girl does like you THEN the guy will find out when he asks for a 2nd date. BUT, during dating nobody tells their true feelings, and nobody really declares boyfriend or girlfriend. So if the girl does not like you and is really just after free meals. Then the infatuated guy will never know.